Circumstantiae involving Westfield, NY and why I haven't been around...

By RM
What ho, long lost readers!

Yeah, so, long story short, last 18 some odd days:

After getting out of jail, totalled car crashing into tree going 40 mph on I-90.

Spent day in hospital, leaving with bruises, a busted nose, a short hair cut (they needed to trim for CAT Scan), and prescriptions for Valium and Vicodin.

The PT? Now scrap.

Returned home to MA in drug addled stupor, which remained through holidays.

Stood in line for six hours to get a Wii for my sister, eventually gaining pity for my injury and weaseling my way to the front of the line.

Got a new bathrobe for christmas.

Drank with Anton.

Got cool silver dollar.

Saw the following movies, equating them to Baseball teams:
Alvin and the Chipmunks: Chicago Cubs (Didn't suck as much as I expected)
Sweeney Todd: New YorkYankees (Sure, it was good, but it still didn't feel right)
National Treasure 2: St. Louis Cardinals (It could've been worse)
I Am Legend: New York Mets (Started out great, then munched hard)
Water Horse: Boston Red Sox (Kid Friendly fun, with a huge yet lovable monster [David Ortiz])

Good. Glad we caught up.

RM
 

Live!....From The Lake County Corectional Facility!

By RM
For those of you who didn't hear, I spent yesterday in the Lake County, Ohio Correctional Facility. This was over some confusion over my license and whether or not it was suspended (OH says yea, FL nay), and I was out by dinner, however, I was in Jail long enough to pass along a few kernels of wisdom along to you, so here they are:

The PMRM's Top 10 Things You DIDN'T know about Ohio County Jail:
10.) The Food is of a higher quality than your school lunches in HS. The trays were nicer as well.
9.) Once prominent Carnegie Mellon professors who got addicted to Cocaine are around every corner.
8.) The Uniforms more closely resemble scrubs than jail cosutmery.
7.) For making your bed, instead of a fitted sheet for the bottom, you are given a giant pillowcase that fits our mattress, speeding up the process of making your bed immensely.
6.) They have premium cable.
5.) Of the 13 men in my cell block with me, 9 had completed at least two years of college education.
4.) The give you free Coffee and Kool-Aid. Whenever you want it.
3.) After the initial "Why're you here?", most people keep their problems to theirselves.
2.) According to the felows in the Maximum block a few floors up, I have a very pretty mouth. One even knew that it I had a "cupid's bow" upper lip.
1.) Convicts love.....and I mean LOVE....Will and Grace. We watched five episodes start to finish.

I hope you learned as much as I did.

RM
 

Wow....THAT was The Golden Compass? Ouch.

By RM
So, not to spoil it if you guys haven't seen it yet, but GC is rough.

Really rough.

If you've been following Rottentomatoes.com, it's freshness is somewhere in the low forties, and it's criticisms are very valid.

I won't give my full opinion here, but if others were to offer their criticisms, I would certainly proffer mine own.

Exciting news in the expanding business world of RM. JFD and I have gone halfsies on a domain here in the Intraweb. The website, which we hope to have up by February, will be a synthesis of recipes, my own small witticisms, as well as shameless advertising for the company.

So, be sure to keep an eye on yourcookbookisnotfurniture.com in the coming months.

Also, since I don't endorse video piracy in any forms, I heartily suggest you all avoid filmhill.com. I certainly wouldn't encourage you to take advantage of it's impressive library of online films and tv shows, nor would I recommend those of you who watch anime to explore its sister site, OAFun.com. It's just not fair to all the gaffers and best boys out there.

Making himself a Betty Crock-ing Chair,
RM
 

On the Matters of Meta-Citizens; or, Why I just don't like Hayden Panittiere

By RM
Counting tonight's writer-strike shortened season finale, I have now watched two full seasons of Heroes. I find the show's premise charming yet unoriginal, yet the writing itself intrigues me. Mainly because of its methodology.

See, each of the ten or so writers is assigned a character, or small group of characters. Then, each week, each writer writes their own character's little scenes, then hands it to whichever of them is doing the full episode, and off to the races.

Granted, this can occasionally make for a level of plot confusion that falls somewhere between LOST and The X-Files, yet still they execute for 95% of the show.

Then there's Hayden. I don't know if I'm just growing old and bitter, but her WB reject routine of rebellion and righteous indignation just feels wrong. Not for her character, and granted I don't think I'm the demographic they're going for with that character. I'm somewhere between Zachary Quinto and Masi Oka (Both of whom I met at Ojai in 06). Still, every time I see her regenerative face in the shot, whining about something when it turns out she was dead wrong all along, I kinda want to hit her. It's that WB/CW complete sense of 'you know what is right and wrong at 17' opinion that we all felt at some point. Maybe I do identify with her. And I'm a little ashamed of it.

With the exception of her, and maybe Peter and Nathan's mother, if you want to see almost flawless 3-D character development and execution, watch a few episodes of this show. The writing for it really is something special.

RM